I have had this post swirling around in my head for several days now. I have been debating on whether or not I want to post it. This is my blog and I guess I can type my feelings if I want to. There is a family waiting to go and get there daughter. This family was going a different route and then found their child on a list. They decided to adopt this child. I imagine that part of it is because of the increasing wait for non special needs adoptions. I know that this is why families are changing over. This is not always a good thing. It has been posted before when last year there were a whole bunch of disruptions of special needs kids because families were not prepared. Most of these families were families that switched over. I'm not saying that all non special needs families are not prepared so please don't think that. I know that there are some special needs families that aren't prepared either. I guess there really is only so much preparation that you can do. For instance, if you know your child has hearing problems wouldn't you want to learn some sign language? Our Sophie's special need is not really one we can prepare ourselves for until she gets here. She has a thorax and spinal deformity. Her ribs are fused together and her spine curves. We don't really know why and we won't know until she gets here. There is a good chance that she has thoracic insufficiency syndrome. We are prepared. We have one of the best Children's Hospital in the country. My sister-in-law worked with the doctor that we are going to use. He is supposed to be one of the best. They have what's called a Vertical Expandable Prosthetic Titanium Rib. It is a device that is inserted into the chest and hooks to the spine and ribs to straighten the spine and seperate the ribs so that the lungs can grow. We are prepared for this. I changed insurances this year so that we would have better coverage. Don't get me wrong, we are nervous. It's all of the unknowns. What if something else is wrong? What if this doesn't fix it? Just as if she was our biological child, we will do anything and everything in our power to help her. I am also nervous because she is 4. What will happen if she doesn't want to go with me? What if she screams her head off? I take comfort in knowing that there are 1,000's of parents out there who have been there and down that way before me. I have read their advice. I have read books. I hope I'm ready. I do know one thing. I am not leaving China without my Sophie. Screaming or not, she will be coming home. That's why they have Benedryl right :). Hopefully soon our TA will come. In the meantime, I have some more reading to do to get ready.